Layers of Love
I once heard someone say love is hard. It’s feels like a job, I listened twice and responded once. What did that mean? Is love some sort of chore you pick up after a long day of work or is something that should feel unconditional no matter what?
When I heard that I began to search within my life what it would entail for me. Love experienced by every human is expressed differently. Our love languages and communication are 9/10 what makes up our relationships in terms of success or failure.
Mastery of love starts with honest communication with ourselves. The most important relationship we have is living with YOU. The level of love we meet ourselves on is the only level we can meet others on. When loving yourself becomes a chore it spreads into every area of life.
I received a notification at 5:50pm Sunday from sprinkle of Jesus “what you don’t heal in your singleness, will spread like a dis-ease, in your togetherness”. I sat with that for a moment, loving ourselves flaws and all is a process within itself. Oftentimes, our love is stretched so far beyond ourselves that the most important individual (YOU) is left to figure out how to heal and love thyself.
I’m still in the process of learning that what I thought was love, was most times just an orgasm and if not this idea of liking the potential of someone.
The layers of love begins with self-care and the understanding of ourselves in order to freely express, honesty the most important in order to have a successful relationship with anyone else it first begins with us. If we can’t keep it real without ourselves, who can we keep it real with? (Ex. Staying in a relationship just for the comfort of it or beginning something new knowing damn well there’s work to do aka healing).
Lastly, having fun. Being alone you learn so much about the depths of your own love. What you allow within your area and what you will not accept. Knowing yourself is the best gift you can give to the world, it’s a process but a beautiful one. Enjoy yourself , learn your layers and most importantly be true to yourself that love is different.
Happy Valentines Day.
As always lots of love and bubbly,